It's already 12:25am and I should be going to sleep. I am tired and restless as usual. But I have to write something here. It has been awhile since I last updated this blog. Another lesson learnt - not easy to maintain multiple blogs! Yes I have another blog which only reveal another part of me while this site is for me to reveal the inner part of me. Yes, I am still in the closet!
It's undoubtedly difficult to be gay, especially here in my country. I can repeat that sentence again and again but it seems like situation won't get any better in the near future. I will just have to endure. And hope that someday I'll come out of the closet and present the whole me and not feeling ashame at all.
How I wish I have a boyfriend now!
Things I love to do if I have a boyfriend :
1) Having any meals together and feeling good even though we're not talking.
2) Watch tv programmes together at night holding hands or sitting side by side or me sleeping on his wide chest. I love to be hugged too!
3) Having hot sex, romantic sex, lotsa kissing most of the night. After that cuddling and kissing until we fall asleep.
4) Wake up every morning besides him and kiss him on the forehead if he's still asleep.
5) Wake up in the morning and knowing that he's making breakfast for me.
6) Gaze into his eyes and see him smile.
7) Thinking of him every minutes knowing that he's thinking of me as well...
The list never end...
Being single... perhaps I should enjoy being a bachelor first.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
In the Sauna...
I went to work out last Sunday at the fitness club after working in the office. (Yeah I was asked to be back in the office to settle something that day.) As expected, there was less people working out there on Sunday. I did all my normal work out and then went for Sauna as usual. I took off my clothes and wrapped my lower body with the towel provided and went to the sauna room.
When I entered the sauna, there was nobody there. Good for me. I found myself a nice seat a unwrapped the towel and enjoy the heat. Since nobody was there, I allowed my cock to grow and erect to its fullest. I don't know why but everytime I enter the sauna, I would want to get a hard on. Anyway, with my hard throbbing cock erect with pride, I pull up the towel to cover up my cock a bit just in case somebody walked in to the sauna room.
As time went by, my cock started to soften as I tried not to get myself horny. Suddenly there was a guy walked in. I quickly cover up my lower body and pretending nothing unusual happened. That guy took his seat and enjoyed his sauna session. His lower body was wrapped with a towel too. I noticed that hewas observing me since he walked in. Then the great part came. I saw his cock was growing and popped out of the towel. I kept looking down and pretend that I didn't notice that. I wanted to avoid any sexual encounter in the public and with a stranger like I once did few months back. I would feel very guilty and depress for some times.
I knew that he was looking at me with his trobbing cock hoping that I would raise my head and saw his hard on. But I kept my head down looking on the floor. After a few minutes when I was sure that he kept his cock under the towel again, then only I raise my head and look around pretending nothing happened.
I am so proud of myself. Normally I would have seen his dick and look at him. Hoping that he would at least took my cock and help me to jerk off. Even though I am still dreaming about it night and day, but I think it is still not safe. Knowing that I have such extrame worry and depression, I better not take any risk!
However, I would get a hard on whenever I think about it, it's so hot!!
When I entered the sauna, there was nobody there. Good for me. I found myself a nice seat a unwrapped the towel and enjoy the heat. Since nobody was there, I allowed my cock to grow and erect to its fullest. I don't know why but everytime I enter the sauna, I would want to get a hard on. Anyway, with my hard throbbing cock erect with pride, I pull up the towel to cover up my cock a bit just in case somebody walked in to the sauna room.
As time went by, my cock started to soften as I tried not to get myself horny. Suddenly there was a guy walked in. I quickly cover up my lower body and pretending nothing unusual happened. That guy took his seat and enjoyed his sauna session. His lower body was wrapped with a towel too. I noticed that hewas observing me since he walked in. Then the great part came. I saw his cock was growing and popped out of the towel. I kept looking down and pretend that I didn't notice that. I wanted to avoid any sexual encounter in the public and with a stranger like I once did few months back. I would feel very guilty and depress for some times.
I knew that he was looking at me with his trobbing cock hoping that I would raise my head and saw his hard on. But I kept my head down looking on the floor. After a few minutes when I was sure that he kept his cock under the towel again, then only I raise my head and look around pretending nothing happened.
I am so proud of myself. Normally I would have seen his dick and look at him. Hoping that he would at least took my cock and help me to jerk off. Even though I am still dreaming about it night and day, but I think it is still not safe. Knowing that I have such extrame worry and depression, I better not take any risk!
However, I would get a hard on whenever I think about it, it's so hot!!
Sunday, October 01, 2006
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