Thursday, June 18, 2009

To Change Or Not To Change (Part 2)

After more than a half year, I actually ask myself this question again : To change or not to change? Last year end, I post an entry asking myself the same question. I was bored then with the job and have the sudden thought of getting away from the company and explore new opportunities. And now, I asked myself the same question again because I was so stressed for the past few weeks that it affects my health. As I mentioned in my previous post, wanting to make a change, I actually applied for a new job in a few companies and went for several interviews.
Been to three companies for technical test and interviews. As at now, two companies actually offered me a position in their company. One is in Subang and another one is in Tropicana. After much consideration, I kindly declined the offer from the company in Subang. Now I am still considering this company in Tropicana.

The package offered is fairly interesting. But I need to work shift every two weeks from 4pm to 1am to provide support to foreign countries. Though I got to work from home during that two weeks and there will be additional allowance for working shift, I am not sure if I will ever enjoy that kind of working lifestyle. Yes, I will get the flexibility of time where I can enjoy spending time with my parents during the day where I no need to work, but I'll have to be working from 4pm to 1am when all my friends will be resting and perhaps partying after their working hours.

My another concern would be working from home. I don't think I am that discipline. Working from home has never been a good idea for me. Too many distraction at home. Watching TV, the bed, the piano, the books, the porn, the whole lot of things can distract me from work! Unless I am a very discipline person where I can concentrate on working and not distracted by other thing. It'll be just IMPOSSIBLE!

OK, I don't know about that, but that's what I think. And it would be a risk to give up my current job and give this new one a try!

My other concern would be whether I am technically strong enough to work for this company. They are using this new java technology which I hardly has any experience of using it. And during the interview, there's a lot of questions asked by the interviewer that I could not answer. Surprisingly the next day, the HR staff of the company called me and say they are going to offer me the position applied. What the... She said I did not fail the technical test and also commented that I have no problem in communicating so I am a good candidate to provide support to customers in foreign countries.

Oh well, good in communicating does not mean that I am good in providing support technically! >.<
So if I were to join this company, I'll have to improve a hell lot technically. I was told that there will be a team lead to guide me. But I wonder how will the team lead guide me if I were to be working from home for the two weeks? Meaning to say, the team lead will also work from home and we will be communicating through internet?

And then what would be my future career? Working as a programmer and developer, will I ever got a chance to be in management? Where will I ever want to be? I still not sure!

Looking back at my current company, what I don't like is their management. And the supervisor, I just can't get enough of complaining about him. His management, his indecisiveness, his ever changing and unclear instructions... all that jazz are driving me crazy. But I now have two more members to work with me. Although they have not yet realize how frustrating to work on this project and to work under this supervisor, I guess sooner or later they will experience whatever I have experienced.

Another thing I don't like about my current company is that we are gonna use some old ancient programming language to develop a system, which is not good for me if I were to plan to excel in the programming world.

Reason for me to stay would be the colleagues, whom I started to enjoy working with though some of them also very frustrated with this project. Another reason would be the two new team members who are under my guidance and supervision. I pity them. Why? First, they are gonna do something they don't like to do. Second, a lot of things they don't know, and I cannot provide the answers. Because me myself also unsure. I am not ready to be the team lead yet. Not in such a big project. I am lack of business knowledge and technically I am not that strong. Me myself need a senior to guide me. And obviously, the current supervisor, is not a good senior.

What other good would it be to stay in this company? I am being trained to be a business analyst. Will I ever be a good business analyst? I doubt so. Why? Because I am not properly trained. I am just thrown with a piece of assignment and the what, where, when, how and which will have to figure out by myself. And the funny thing is, whatever I submitted are not reviewed by my supervisor. How will I ever know whether I am right or wrong? How can I ever improved?

Sigh.

But I have bee working in this company for almost four years. I have got used to a lot of things. Colleagues, the admin, the working style and all other small small matters... the thought of adapting into a new environment also can be scary. Not sure how the colleagues in the new company will be. Are they as friendly as the colleague I have now? How will the working environment be? Will the team lead as bad as my current supervisor? All these uncertainties are also driving me insane.

To change or not to change, I really need more time to consider.

4 comments:

C'est la vie said...

Yea, I guess you should give yourself more time... Career change will lead to anxiety, frustration, uncertainties and workplace culture shock. You have to know your strengths and what you really like, in comparing your current job and the one which offering you the new opportunity. All the best, wish you well!

Christine said...

For me, I would choose the one with better working environment. Working in an unpleasant workplace is rather frustrating.

Good luck!

Emo-Happiness said...

Supports to work there.
A new life.. new beginning
Plus you mention the package is great..


Gambate..

Emotioeel

Chris said...

Yeah, think twice b4 u make any decision..