Saturday, January 12, 2008

The Piano Tuner

It was that boring Tuesday afternoon that I received a phone call from a total stranger (well, a lady in fact) who informed me that my piano has not been tuned since decades ago and whether I want to have someone tune my old, rotten and dusted piano for me the next day. Having to work the next day and I don't want my piano to be tuned (or screwed) without me, I requested the piano tuner to be delivered to my home this weekend. Delivered? Ooh, sounds like ordering an escort or gigolo?!

So you want me?!

Not very pleased with my request, she compromisingly said she will try to arrange and request the piano tuner come over to my house this Saturday, which I responded :"It's better be 10 in the morning! 'Cause after that I might need to go out (on a date)!" Hell, I don't even have a boyfriend to begin with. I'm such a bitch! But really, to have someone come over to my house and steal my space and privacy for like an hour on Saturday is really a big compromise for me. So, I have to be bitchy a bit. 10am, settle it fast and leave me alone!

So this morning, I woke around 9am. Thought of waking up a bit earlier, but I have a late night sleep last night so... you know. Over-sleep a bit on Saturday morning isn't a sin. So once I got up, I have to tidy up my room a bit (yes, my piano is in my room). Ain't gonna let a total stranger be shocked to enter a gay room finding too many porn stashes or wall full with half-naked hunky stud wall-paper. Oh no, I'm just kidding. I don't stick hunky wallpaper on the wall nowadays. That was so "last-time"! I keep all my sexy hunky-licious men in my computer. So I just need to off the computer. And maybe keep my wardrobe closed tight at all time to avoid anyone sense any gayness from there. You know, what one wears tell a lot about one's personality and who one is. Blah... Luckily my room was not that messy. So it just took me awhile to get everything "in order". And so I waited.

While waiting, I can't help but to imagine who will be the piano tuner? An old uncle with big belly? Eeew... or a skinny young lad who wears t-shirt and baggy jeans? Nooo!!! I can't recall I see any piano tuner in any movie I watched. I have a general idea of how a piano player will look like (recalling from so many movies I watched in my entire life). Movies like "The Pianist", "The Legend of 1900", "Food of Love"... most of them are not hunky, not very good-looking too. But no doubt they're talented. They use their hands to impress people. Every little fingers of theirs make wonders and magic! And a piano tuner? Hmm... who would want to know about a life of a piano tuner?! And that leave me with a lot of imagination.

Oh, who will he be like?

Forget about the uncle look and skinny lad. I would want to think of him as someone like John Barrowman. Oh no, not John! He's just too good for that! Excuse my obsession with him lately. Ermmm... let's see. A piano tuner should have a bulky arms. Oh yes, tuning the string of the piano needs some strength at the arms. Oh and he should know to at least play a simple song if not a piano grade 8 student. Maybe someone with perfect pitch even a slight out of tune with make his ears move a bit?! Or someone who can play by ear? You know, listen to a tune and he can play that song instantly?! Maybe not, just a piano tuner doesn't mean he is a jazz player!

And I also thought about what should I do with the piano tuner? Watching him tune the piano from behind? Oh, unless he's half-naked I don't mind staring a hunky stud's back. Ryan Barry or Reichen. Both are good. Or join him in tuning the piano? You know, help him press the key and he check on the vibration of the key sound and tune accordingly. Maybe somewhere in between we would accidentally touch each other. No? Or maybe a few eyes-staring and a few smiles will have my door room closed and we would "tuned" each other off?

Yeah, come on baby!

Urgh, boring! If only the piano tuner look anyone like Chris Evans or Chad White, I don't mind working my way down at his lower body while he's tuning my piano. Or grab him from behind, turn him around and stuck my hot wet tongue down his throat and suck it hard! Oh, that would be so much more than just a french-kiss! OK, that's just too much! The piano tuner won't be a Caucasian, sadly.

Anyway, while fantasizing what kind of man he will be like, the doorbell rang and he's here. OMG, not having my hair combed yet, I quickly grabbed a cap and put it on my head to hide my messy hair and reached for the door. Damned, why was I fucking care about how I look?! I opened the door and there he was standing there with a smile on his face. Err... no, not what I have expected. Just plain young dude who wears nicely. Not only because I am not into Asian, but there was nothing from him that I am attracted to. From face, down to his body... no... not my type. I invited him into the room and let him do whatever he needs to do with my piano. And all those fantasies... pooh and they're all gone! It was like waking up from a dream and all hopes suddenly disappear...

I hate the fact that reality and fantasy are always SO different!

9 comments:

Gauzzel said...

all your porns are scenario based i guess?

lol

Janvier said...

Sorry. We only could concentrate on this bit: Your piano is in your room?

Queer Ranter said...

Awww poor thing. Well I'm sure there's a hawt looking piano tuner somewhere out there. :P

Jason said...

Susahlah like that. Lower down your expectation a bit :)

garyan said...

wow! this reminds me of the latest episode i had with the furnace guy! there is something between the blue and white color guys...

Mr Rainbow Man said...

so funny... but that reminds me, i need to get my piano to be tuned too... it has been a very long time....

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