Sunday, January 06, 2008

To Touch and Be Touched

Not talking about touching someone's body part or being touched by someone at the wrong place at the wrong time. I have to admit though, a potential pervert like me always fantasizing about being touched by a hot hunk. Well, nothing wrong about fantasizing or day-dreaming. I hope I am not obsessing with those fantasies.

So where do you want me to touch, boy?

Anyway, I am talking about being touched, at the heart, by something or by someone. Lately I have been selecting some romantic, heart-warming, touching movies or drama series to watch. Just to be touched again, by the sweet romantic prince charming, or by the outstanding performance of a couple singing duet "All I ask of you"... Come on, even watching Mariah Carey singing can be touching as well. And yes, I watch chic-flick too! Some of the stories can be so touching (even though, yes, I know they are mostly UNREAL!)

I am coming to touch you, sweetheart!

Oh you should know how much I like to watch Oprah! I still remember watching Oprah EVERYDAY after I graduate from university before I got my first job. I basically switch on the TV everyday at 1pm Astro channel 70 just to watch the Oprah interviewing some extraordinary people. Not to mention she likes to give surprises to the guest and the audience. Each and every episode she is giving away something to the audience. Gosh, she must be SO rich! And every time when she realize someone's dream and talk about them, it always makes me cry like a stupid baby.

Don't cry, baby!

And so after stepping into this working hell-ish world, I don't even have the chance to watch that show anymore. So I guess "Brothers & Sisters" really is a good substitute for Oprah show. Family drama, yes, always touching and I love it to the max. I know, at times there's heart-breaking moment, but I guess that's life. That makes the show more realistic and easy for me to relate to.

It's really easy, sometime, to be touched by a good movies or performance. But I also have been thinking about if I have ever touched someone's heart in my life? Or if I have ever been touched by anyone with his/her kindness and/or wonderful deed? Not much I guess. I still remember I have this friend of mine. We were pretty close. We sent sms to each other when anyone of us facing big challenges. It was really memorable. Some of the touching sms I still keep as a memory for me to cherish. Yes, sometime a simple sms of concern, or encouragement, can be very touching and powerful.

I remember spending hours to write an inspiring poem for my friends so that they see hope in life. I remember pressing on my phone's keypad for don't know how long typing motivating sms to friends. And I felt great. It's like creating hopes in life and spreading loves and cares to the people around you. And the replies were most of the time touching as well. And I missed those times.

Those memories...

Why never keeping the habit? I guess working life is different. I don't have much time to write. Not even have a few seconds to think about inspiring poems or sms. Mostly what I want to do is get my work done or steal some times to rest and enjoy myself. It's amazing how working can take over a lot of our time and blind us from who we really are! You see, I have been (unconsciously) thinking about my whole life. And I guess I still don't really know myself. Not sure of what I really want, who I really want to be and how I wanna live my life. Still like a kid needing someone to guide and lead me to the right direction.

Where should I go from here?

Well, I am still young. Guess I have a lot more time to search for my true-self.

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