Stupid Dream

I found myself busy doing something. I was not really sure what I was busy with. But I was running here and there preparing for something. Deep down inside, I know. I didn't want it to happened.

What is it that I really want?!

And then I saw this lady. I can't remember who she was. She was busy with something to. Just like me, busy doing something that I was busy with. And then I saw my parents were busy entertaining my relatives. They were talking and laughing. It look so much like a celebration.

Then I found myself stop doing anything and observing the whole situation. Fuck, I was preparing for my wedding. And I was gonna married to that lady I barely knew. Anxious and shocked, the phrase "What am I gonna do?!" kept rehearsing in my mind. I knew I had to stop all that. I must not let it happen before it is too late. And then I ran towards my mother, grabbed her arms and pull her to somewhere we could talk.

Yeah, we need to talk!

Me : Mom, I barely know that girl!
Mother : (Shocked!) What?!
Me : I cannot marry that girl!
Mother : Oh gosh, we must stop this wedding then!

I woke up in the morning feeling tired. Stupid dream! It's fucking stupid! And I thought I would come out the my mother right there in my dream. Instead, I just found myself I barely knew that girl! I also find it funny that if I didn't know that girl, why would we prepare for our wedding?! Is it through match-making? Through parents' arrangement? But then my mom wouldn't have stopped if she arrange the lady for me.

Arrange me a hunky stud, please!

Well, it's just a dream anyway. A nightmare for me I would say! I can never imagine myself really marry to a girl. Well, unless I have lost all my sexual desire or sex drive. Otherwise, I will never be happy marrying to a female.

It must be the drama series sinchronicity I was watching last night that caused me to have that stupid dream. Jase, at the end, still pretty much in denial. He still doesn't admit that he's gay even though he has such strong feeling for Mani.


Jase and Mani - About their STD


And I hate the fact that I wasn't having a hot, sexy and steamy wet dream about Dr Mani throwing me into the sofa kissing me passionately, or having hot steamy sex in his apartment, or having him make me a cup of coffee... or just looking into his dreamy eyes would already be good enough. Instead, I have this fucking stupid dream that make me tired all day long!

Doesn't life always go against your will?!

Jase break up with Mani


Heart-breaking, isn't it?! Well, that's life and you better got used to it! I didn't say you should give up though! Because you'll never know what comes next! :p